Friday, May 19, 2006

Tour de France, it wasn’t

They other day we loaded up the wagon and met up with some friends for a bike ride. The plan was just an easy ride through the suburbs of Minneapolis but, like most of our plans, adventure wouldn’t be lacking. I was riding my new bike with Back Seat Baby towed behind in the Burley. Shotgun was there along with 5 others (whom I’ll eventually think of names for) and one more baby in a Burley.

The first half mile of the ride went great; sprits were high and everyone was enjoying the evening. Then, out of no where, disaster struck. My old trusty bike, being ridden by That-Trucks-Gotta-Compensate-For-Something-Guy, just gave up the ghost and the right side pedal crank sheered right off. Don’t worry, there’ll be an investigation, but that’s for another post. I couldn’t believe it. Now Compensate had a choice to make, continue on with one pedal or go back and wait for everyone to come home. Well, the guy went with the team and plowed through. It was an impressive sight to say the least.

The ride continued at a leisurely pace through a ritzy gated golf community. Shotgun and I were distracted by a snapping turtle on the side of the road (alive, and big). I was about to pick it up when the following conversation took place.

Me: reaching for the turtle
Shotgun: “don’t pick it up, you’ll get hurt”
Me: thinking to self “naah, I think I’ll be ok”
Shotgun: while telepathically sensing my thoughts “At least don’t teach Back Seat Baby that it’s ok to pit up snapping turtles”
Me: “Point taken, OK”

While we were distracted by the turtle, Compensate Guy was attacked by a vicious ankle biting dog. The dog cunningly waited until its prey was in the middle of the cul-de-sac and then went in for the kill. Remember, Compensate only had one pedal and I think the dog saw this. There was no escaping. After a brief skirmish, it looked like the beast was going to win. Compensate was saved when the animals handler (an elderly woman) came down from her porch rocking chair and called off the attack. At that team decided to turn around and head back. The choice was pretty easy since, as mentioned before, we were in a cul-de-sac.

On the way back the chain on my bike broke. Not fell off, broke! Yeah, I just bought it this spring. I was not happy and will be making a trip to the local bike shop. After several attempts at field repair by LanceWith2, we moved Back Seat Baby to Shotgun’s bike, then Compensate and I walked our bikes home. At this point, LanceWith2 separated from the peleton and rode back a time trial pace. He hopped in Compensate’s truck and picked us up on the side of the road.

While Compensate and I were waiting for LanceWith2, a pregnant Shotgun was pulling Back Seat Baby through the rolling terrain of the south west metro. What an Iron woman! It was a tremendous display of total bad assness. All were impressed and the feat was discussed over beers when we got back.

Note: I know this was way too long; I’ll try to shorten up or break future posts into two parts.


Anonymous said...

This is from ShotGun's Dad who will be known as Dampa. What does Compensate have to say about his nickname and yes I am impressed by Shotgun & her pulling BackSeatBaby. She just had to much stubborness to ask for help. I should know because she got that from me.

Mam said...

Just a thought, but I'd be reallllly nice to Compensate if you ever want to use his truck.

The Godmother said...

Ummm, let's just hope preganant Shotgun wasn't partaking in the beer ingestion.

Anonymous said...

I do not mind the nickname Compensate. I guess it could have been worse, for instance "the man with one leg" or "pull to the left". I also agree with with Mam but alas I am a sucker and cannot say no to my friends especially when free beer is envolved. I said unless FREE BEER is envolved. A man does have dignity.

Anonymous said...

ok...this is Compensates better half...let's just say that he had maybe one too many of those free beers tonight at softball...and man oh man does he need spell check!